For lack of a better title

Originally posted Tuesday, January 20, 2009 at 2:12am

Well, another semester is upon us. I wish I had written more over the break, dear reader, but it is what it is, and there seems to be no good comeback to that remark. What are you supposed to say? "No, you fathead, you've got it all wrong. It isn't what it is!" See, it just doesn't work.
I am excited to be back in Oklahoma in most respects. However, I misplaced a book from Bizzell Library last semester, and now I can't find it anywhere. I've already renewed it twice, and I'm running out of options. I just don't know where to turn.
On the other hand, there are several problems with my house. For one thing, the water in the kitchen faucet will arbitrarily turn from hot to cold to hot again, and the garage door has a mind of its own. To get it to shut, you press the button, but it usually opens again, so you must stop it by pounding on the button three or four times in succession, and then pressing the button again, at which point it usually continues going up, and you have to pound on it another three or four times. You have to do that at least two or three times before it closes again, and when it reaches the bottom it usually opens again, and you have to repeat THAT whole routine two or three times before it finally stays down. I blame the poltergeists.
I've been attempting to fill out some job applications for this summer. So far, I'm applying to a Christian summer camp and to a Christian missionary organization to do an internship overseas, but I think I'd like to apply for some real jobs as well to balance out my options. I must say that filling out applications is incredibly frustrating and depressing. I especially hate the part where they ask for references, because I never have that information handy. Maybe I should type it up and store it all in one convenient place where I could . . . hmm . . . refer to it or something every time I needed it.
So I have been doing a fair amount of cooking recently, since I actually had access to a kitchen. The other week I made the most inauthentic jambalaya ever. I must have changed the recipe in five or six different ways. Like, apparently when you make jambalaya you're supposed to use something called filé powder, which comes from sassafras, and it has some kind of special flavor and also acts as a thickening agent. Yeah, so I don't even know where you would buy that because Shaw's didn't have it, so I used cornstarch instead. Now, I'm no logician, dear reader, but the food turned out pretty well anyway, which probably means the original recipe sucks.
Grocery shopping is actually kind of fun. I like to look at all the strange and exotic foodstuffs. The other day I saw a jar of these small red orbs floating in juice. The label said "Maraschino cherries," with a small box below that advertising the fact that they came "with stems." Because clearly, the stems are the most delicious part. In the olden times, our ancestors used ALL of the cherry.
A few days ago I cut my finger on a knife. My knife-handling skills may not be the greatest, but rest assured, I was not playing mumbletypeg or chopping tomatoes or anything like that. The knife was sitting in the dishwasher, and I just bumped my hand against it as I walked past. Fortunately I was unloading the dishwasher at the time, so the knife was probably clean, and I probably won't die of tetanus. (I actually found out the other day that the whole rusty-nail-in-the-foot thing is misleading. People don't get tetanus from rust, but tetanus germs like to live in the soil.)
You know, I really do a lot of stupid things. The other day I went skiing, and when I was done, I was about to get in my car and drive away, when I realized that I couldn't find my keys. I must have looked in my jacket pockets for a good five minutes, and I almost walked back to the ski trail to look for them until I realized that they were dangling out of my car door. And this reminded me a lot of the time at summer camp nine or ten years ago when I bought an ice cream sandwich at the snack stand and for a few moments thought I had lost my change, until I realized it was in my other hand, between my palm and the ice cream. They do seem to be one of the grand overarching themes of these notes of mine, but time would fail me if I were to tell you of all the stupid things I have done. I'd like to be smarter, but I'd also like these notes to be funnier. These goals conflict.
Some people would attribute all of these things to a lack of common sense, but as a philosopher, I know that common sense is overrated. One of the best ways to become famous as a philosopher is to think up something crazy and then believe it. Here's looking at you, David Lewis. Wikipedia calls your theory of modal realism "catastrophically counterintuitive." Somewhere out there in the great blue yonder there is a possible world where you're not dead yet and I'm giving you a high-five right now.
Of course, an even better way to become famous as a philosopher is to actually BE crazy. Hats off, Friedrich Nietszche.
Anyway, I think one of my major problems is that I'm far too self-critical, but I'm sure there are a lot of other things wrong with me as well.

So it occurred to me recently how odd it is that "Good day" and "good night" only make sense as salutations, whereas "good morning," "good afternoon," and "good evening" only make sense as greetings. Now, in the case of "good evening" and "good night," this might have to do with the fact that stereotypically, people meet each other in the evening and then head their separate ways as evening turns into night, but that's not necessarily the case. For example, suppose you are carrying on an illicit love affair with your next-door neighbor and you are meeting them for a 2 am secret rendezvous on a staircase outside a building hidden behind a shrubbery so that you can determine the time and place of your next romantic liaison. You can't greet your neighborly paramour by saying "Good night," because that would sound odd. Instead you must resort to "Howdy," or "Wassup?" or perhaps "Lookin' good, hot stuff."
Incidentally, every now and then I read a book and come across a line or two which are just absolutely amazing when taken out of context, so for your enjoyment I would now like to run together two sentences from "Thinking and Deciding," which I recommend, with two from the novel "The Temple of the Golden Pavilion," which I don't.

"Appointments are a good idea, because they allow people to meet who would not otherwise meet. The long-run harm from breaking a single appointment is difficult to think about.
Presently I came to realize that my conviction - the conviction that I could never be loved - was itself the basic state of human existence. So now you know how I lost my virginity!"

I think they sort of almost fit together, don't you?

Psalm 118:9 It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in princes.

Romans 12:16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

Your humble servant,

Tomonthy